Done right, talking dirty can start in foreplay, and make every part of the sex experience more interesting and enjoyable. “Lots of people are scared of dirty talk because it feels awkward, they fear rejection, or they are worried they will say something stupid or that doesn’t land. And to be honest, sometimes you probably will! Learn to be ok with the clunky,” says Alice Child, a sexologist and relationship therapist at the sexual wellness platform SheSpot. “You are learning a new skill and that takes time and practice! A lot of the time, when people think of “dirty talk,” they think of the sort of graphic and vulgar dialogue used in porn.

Do you want to get wild in bed tonight?

Don’t pretend they’re some sort of alien that has no idea what sex is. Everyone knows what it is, we’re all here because of it. There is no such thing as perfection, even in sex. That’s why I made this list of specific things you can say to turn him on. It’s hard to say someone else’s words so I’m not going to tell you to say any of these exactly, these are just some ideas to get your imagination running wild.

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Later on, you catch him watching porn lustfully pleasuring himself, while you, an actual woman, are merely feet from him. He seems more than willing to participate with a computer, while completely shutting down on you. Think of three words to describe his body as well. If he’s insecure about what he’s working with, reassure him by telling him just how much you love his tool. There is no correct answer to this question, but it will reveal if you two view sex differently or not. If you know what he’s looking at, you’ll know what to flaunt.

Guys like it when they know that they made you have an orgasm. So, whether you’re talking dirty to a guy over text or when you’re in bed, let him know that you’re about to climax. Too many girls judge themselves for no reason at all. So, don’t judge yourself, even if you think you said something stupid or cheesy.

• They might not have the language to tell you why it bothered them in the moment, but if you get the sense that you pushed things too far, definitely talk about it later.
• The easiest way to freestyle effective dirty talk is expressing what you like, what you want, and how turned on you are.
• You can even make things extra dirty by sending hot pictures.
• Sure, talking dirty to a guy is exciting and fun, but you probably didn’t know that there are some actual benefits to it too.
• Conversations like these make for fun sexual conversations while making out with each other.
• Whether or not you’ve had sex yet, it still builds that connection between the two of you to make your sex better and bring you closer together.

It opens up a safe arena to talk about some topics that could be difficult to bring up when you are in the heat of the moment. Step outside yourself by creating a character or persona to inhabit while you’re learning how to talk dirty. Creating a little bit of distance, Manta says, might make people feel safer. Porn is an obvious place to hunt for inspiration for examples of how to talk dirty, though Dr. Jansen suggests looking in the ethical porn or feminist porn category to ensure that it’s mutually respectful. Some of the best inspiration for dirty talk during sex can also be pulled from erotic fiction. Plus, as both Manta and Dr. Jansen mentioned, you can always find your way into sex forums and dating apps.

• This question will boost his ego and help him open up to you about his own personal life beyond your relationship.
• I want to take you on a midnight drive and then fuck you senseless on the hood of the car.
• If you’re a newbie Lowrie advises thinking of it like flirting and foreplay.
• Men are visual, so, you want to make sure that when you’re dirty talking, you use a lot of description.
• It’s kind of like having training wheels until you feel confident enough to ditch the book and fly solo.

Here's some inspiration for dirty things to say to your partner to keep sexual energy flowing in your relationship. The dirty things you say to your partner should feel natural and flow with the moment. It doesn't have to be super creative; it just needs to feel good to you and your partner. "Good sex is supposed to be freeing and explorative," Boodram explains.

Also, don’t judge the guy for talking dirty to you too. Along the lines of using profanity, some people also like to degrade their partners in bed. That means calling them a bitch, slut, whore, etc. Well, try to stay away from that even if you like it – especially if you don’t know the guy that well who you are talking dirty with. If you’re not with each other at the moment, then talking dirty to a guy over text is a great way to get him thinking about you.